Taking care of telemarketer.

[A.J.]

The phone rang as I was setting down to my anticipated evening meal, and as
I answered it I was greeted with " is this William Wagenhoss" not sounding
anything like my name, so I said who is calling?

The telemarketer said he was with The Rubber band Powered Freezer company
or something like that and then I asked him if he knew William personally
and why was he calling this number. I then said off to the side, "get
really good pictures of the body and all the blood" then turned back to the
phone and advised the caller that he had entered a murder scene and must
stay on the line because we had already traced this call and he would be
receiving a summons to appear in the local courthouse to testify in this
murder case.

I then questioned the caller at great length as to his name, address,
phone number at home, at work, who he worked for, how he knew the dead guy
and could he prove where he had been about one hour before he made this
call.


The telemarketer was getting very concerned and his answers were given in a
shakey voice. I then told him we had located his position at his work place
and the police were entering the building to take him into custody. At that
point I heard the phone fall and the scurrying of his running away.

My wife asked me as I returned to our table why I had tears streaming down
my face and so help me, I couldn't tell her for about fifteen minutes.


My meal was cold, but after what I had pulled, very enjoyable.

 

[Matt Ion]

Those are both classics!

I've heard some great ones... one I remember reading about was a
telemarketer who was offering some whiz-bang investment opportunity.
After the TM went on enthusiastically at some length about the quality
of the investment and anticipated wonderful returns, the person he
called asked if he'd be willing to stake his life on his claims. The
caller was unsure of what this meant. The mark explained it to him:
"Are you sure of this that you will kill yourself if it doesn't pan out?
I want it in writing that you'll kill yourself if it's no good."

That ended that call pretty quick...

That was great!

My favorite is let the telemarketer talk for about a minute. Then I take a
long breath, sigh into the phone and say in a low voice, "What are you
wearing?" They usually hang up immediately.

Once I had received a call from a telemarketer from California selling
office supplies. I kept him on the phone about 15 minutes with BS then
asked him why he had called. He had almost forgotten. He said he was
selling ball point pens. I said, "Super, I think I need to reorder some
pens. About 5 years ago, I ordered a whole case and I only have 2 or 3
left"
He excitedly asked if it had been a case of 144 boxes. I paused and
explained no, the box had 12 pens in it. We did a good job of keeping up
with them. He hung up too.

When I have time, I always mess around with them. Makes my day.
Allan






I choose Polesoft Lockspam to fight spam, and you?
http://www.polesoft.com/refer.html

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[Doug L]

Tell them you are glad they called because you can save them money on their
alarm services, ask the caller if they have an alarm system, if they don't
ask if they want one, if they have one ask if they would like to save money
on the monitoring, prepare a script and read it back to them without letting
them get a word in edgeways, answer any question from them with a question
of your own about an alarm system. If they ask you if you would like to save
money on whatever it is they are selling, ask them if they would like to
save money on their alarm service.

Me, I don't say a word I just hang up

Doug L
--

 

[Crash Gordon]

I just tell them our purchasing agent's name is Barney and he's not here
right now. Then when they call back and ask for Barney (oh yes, I spoke to
Barney last week about buying widgets from us) we know it's a salesperson we
dont want to talk to....and Barney is always at some tradeshow...he's never
around.


| Tell them you are glad they called because you can save them money on
their
| alarm services, ask the caller if they have an alarm system, if they don't
| ask if they want one, if they have one ask if they would like to save
money
| on the monitoring, prepare a script and read it back to them without
letting
| them get a word in edgeways, answer any question from them with a question
| of your own about an alarm system. If they ask you if you would like to
save
| money on whatever it is they are selling, ask them if they would like to
| save money on their alarm service.
|
| Me, I don't say a word I just hang up
|
| Doug L
| --
|
| | > Those are both classics!
| >
| > I've heard some great ones... one I remember reading about was a
| > telemarketer who was offering some whiz-bang investment opportunity.
After
| > the TM went on enthusiastically at some length about the quality of the
| > investment and anticipated wonderful returns, the person he called asked
| > if he'd be willing to stake his life on his claims. The caller was
unsure
| > of what this meant. The mark explained it to him: "Are you sure of this
| > that you will kill yourself if it doesn't pan out? I want it in writing
| > that you'll kill yourself if it's no good."
| >
| > That ended that call pretty quick...
| >
| > Allan Waghalter wrote:
| >> That was great!
| >>
| >> My favorite is let the telemarketer talk for about a minute. Then I
take
| >> a long breath, sigh into the phone and say in a low voice, "What are
you
| >> wearing?" They usually hang up immediately.
| >>
| >> Once I had received a call from a telemarketer from California selling
| >> office supplies. I kept him on the phone about 15 minutes with BS then
| >> asked him why he had called. He had almost forgotten. He said he was
| >> selling ball point pens. I said, "Super, I think I need to reorder
some
| >> pens. About 5 years ago, I ordered a whole case and I only have 2 or 3
| >> left"
| >> He excitedly asked if it had been a case of 144 boxes. I paused and
| >> explained no, the box had 12 pens in it. We did a good job of keeping
up
| >> with them. He hung up too.
| >>
| >> When I have time, I always mess around with them. Makes my day.
| >> Allan
| >>
| >>
| >> | >>
| >>>The phone rang as I was setting down to my anticipated evening meal,
and
| >>>as
| >>>I answered it I was greeted with " is this William Wagenhoss" not
| >>>sounding
| >>>anything like my name, so I said who is calling?
| >>>
| >>>The telemarketer said he was with The Rubber band Powered Freezer
company
| >>>or something like that and then I asked him if he knew William
| >>>personally
| >>>and why was he calling this number. I then said off to the side,
"get
| >>>really good pictures of the body and all the blood" then turned back to
| >>>the
| >>>phone and advised the caller that he had entered a murder scene and
must
| >>>stay on the line because we had already traced this call and he would
be
| >>>receiving a summons to appear in the local courthouse to testify in
this
| >>>murder case.
| >>>
| >>>I then questioned the caller at great length as to his name, address,
| >>>phone number at home, at work, who he worked for, how he knew the dead
| >>>guy
| >>>and could he prove where he had been about one hour before he made this
| >>>call.
| >>>
| >>>
| >>>The telemarketer was getting very concerned and his answers were given
in
| >>>a
| >>>shakey voice. I then told him we had located his position at his work
| >>>place
| >>>and the police were entering the building to take him into custody. At
| >>>that
| >>>point I heard the phone fall and the scurrying of his running away.
| >>>
| >>>My wife asked me as I returned to our table why I had tears streaming
| >>>down
| >>>my face and so help me, I couldn't tell her for about fifteen minutes.
| >>>
| >>>
| >>>My meal was cold, but after what I had pulled, very enjoyable.
| >>>
| >>
| >>
| >>
| >> I choose Polesoft Lockspam to fight spam, and you?
| >> http://www.polesoft.com/refer.html
| >
| >
| > ---
| > avast! Antivirus: Outbound message clean.
| > Virus Database (VPS): 0602-3, 01/13/2006
| > Tested on: 1/13/2006 10:10:49 PM
| > avast! - copyright (c) 1988-2005 ALWIL Software.
| > http://www.avast.com
| >
| >
| >
|
|
|

 

[RobertM]

Woman telemarketer called, "May I speak to the lady of the house?" I
answered, "I'm sorry, she's in bed with a customer, are you applying for
work here?" Click.

Bob

 

[mikey]

Tell them you are glad they called because you can save them money on their
alarm services, ask the caller if they have an alarm system, if they don't
ask if they want one, if they have one ask if they would like to save money
on the monitoring, prepare a script and read it back to them without letting
them get a word in edgeways, answer any question from them with a question
of your own about an alarm system. If they ask you if you would like to save
money on whatever it is they are selling, ask them if they would like to
save money on their alarm service.

Me, I don't say a word I just hang up

That's the most efficient method. After you answer, there is a noticeable
pause with a lot of them while the system hunts for the next free operator.
If you can hang up before the Op is reached, you're number is dropped from
the system. I noticed quite the reduction in calls doing this. I can't bring
myself to hang up the business line though.

 

[Robert L Bass]

Sometimes I just tell them I'm interested in their [whatever] and
ask them to hold for a moment while I change phones. Then I
place them on hold and go back to what I was doing.
--

Regards,
Robert L Bass

Bass Burglar Alarms
The Online DIY Store
http://www.BassBurglarAlarms.com

 

[Crash Gordon]

excellent


| Woman telemarketer called, "May I speak to the lady of the house?" I
| answered, "I'm sorry, she's in bed with a customer, are you applying for
| work here?" Click.
|
| Bob

 

[ABLE_1]

Personally I shoot every other [tm] that calls so the ratio has gotten a lot
better over the years.

This is a small question to all that have been slicing and dicing the
Telemarketers.

Just wondering, do any of you use Telemarketers for your business leads???

TIA

 

[A43A43]

When I get a call from a solicitation company (or a survey call as they call
them now), I dont speak, just use the time to practice tunes on my phone
keypad until they hang up.

 

[Doug L]

http://www.wilsonmar.com/1music.htm#TouchToneSongs

Doug L

 

[A43A43]

ROTFLMAO

http://www.wilsonmar.com/1music.htm#TouchToneSongs

Doug L

 

[Guest]

One night I got a call from local company. She was trying to sell me a Alarm
System. I told her I had a "REAL" alarm system. "She didn't get that one."
Then she said they could beat anyone price on monitoring. I said ok how much
are you going to pay me? She didn't get that one either. She you have to pay
US. I said well if you are going to beat my price then you are going to pay
me. She then ask what I was paying. I said "NOTHING". Then she said well you
don't have a monitored system. I said I told you I have a "REAL ALARM
SYSTEM" That's when I told her I owned the Company and we installed Real
Alarms and not the 2 door and a motion like they did. She hung up on me. In
less than a year they were out of business.

Now thanks to the DO NOT CALL LIST I don't get any calls.

This was the same company that I went to do a take over and the wires were
run down the wall starting about a foot from the ceiling, When they came to
a wall they just drilled a holes threw the wall and keep going. Four wired
and four holes about two inches apart. I wish I had a camera that day. I
told the man sorry but I could not take over the system because it was not
properly installed. Didn't want my name connected to that P.O.S.

 

[Matt Ion]

This was the same company that I went to do a take over and the wires were
run down the wall starting about a foot from the ceiling, When they came to
a wall they just drilled a holes threw the wall and keep going. Four wired
and four holes about two inches apart. I wish I had a camera that day.

This is why I now have a camera phone


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