Mathematical jokes

[Paul Burridge]

Hi all,

Anyone know any rip-roaringly amusing mathematical jokes? I mean, of
the non-binary kind, since although they were side-splittingly funny,
we did cover those a few months back.

p.

 

[John Woodgate]

I read in sci.electronics.design that Paul Burridge

Anyone know any rip-roaringly amusing mathematical jokes? I mean, of the
non-binary kind, since although they were side-splittingly funny, we did
cover those a few months back.

Yes, but being mathematical, it can't be written in ASCII.

Take this 'pseudo-code' and write in mathematical symbols:

Limit, as alpha tends to infinity, of 3 = 8.

 

[Spehro Pefhany]

Hi all,

Anyone know any rip-roaringly amusing mathematical jokes? I mean, of
the non-binary kind, since although they were side-splittingly funny,
we did cover those a few months back.

Dean, to the physics department. "Why do I always have to give you
guys so much money, for laboratories and expensive equipment and
stuff. Why couldn't you be like the math. department - all they need
is money for pencils, paper and waste-paper baskets. Or even better,
like the philosophy department. All they need are pencils and paper."

Best regards,
Spehro Pefhany

 

[Winfield Hill]

Spehro Pefhany wrote...

Dean, to the physics department. "Why do I always have to give you
guys so much money, for laboratories and expensive equipment and
stuff. Why couldn't you be like the math. department - all they need
is money for pencils, paper and waste-paper baskets. Or even better,
like the philosophy department. All they need are pencils and paper."

ROFLOL!

Thanks,
- Win

whill_at_picovolt-dot-com

 

[Genome]

Hi all,

Anyone know any rip-roaringly amusing mathematical jokes? I mean, of
the non-binary kind, since although they were side-splittingly funny,
we did cover those a few months back.

p.

In the beginning there was One.

One was feeling a bit lonely so he invented Two.

Two wasn't overly impressed with One's conversational abilities and invented
Three.

With One, Two and Three they had the opportunity to have a good bloody
argument and fragmented.

The rest is history.

That's a DNA original.

DNA

 

[Kevin Aylward]

Dean, to the physics department. "Why do I always have to give you
guys so much money, for laboratories and expensive equipment and
stuff. Why couldn't you be like the math. department - all they need
is money for pencils, paper and waste-paper baskets. Or even better,
like the philosophy department. All they need are pencils and paper."

Ahh. did you get my one on this befoe.

"Any sufficiently advanced philosophical discussion is indistinguishable
from bullshit"

The othe rone I picked up is.

There are only 10 types of people in this world. Those that understand
binary, and those that don't.

Kevin Aylward
[email protected]
http://www.anasoft.co.uk
SuperSpice, a very affordable Mixed-Mode
Windows Simulator with Schematic Capture,
Waveform Display, FFT's and Filter Design.

http://www.anasoft.co.uk/replicators/index.html

Understanding, is itself an emotion, i.e. a feeling.
Emotions or feelings can only be "understood" by
consciousness. "Understanding" consciousness can
therefore only be understood by consciousness itself,
therefore the "hard problem" of consciousness, is
intrinsically unsolvable.

Physics is proven incomplete, that is, no
understanding of the parts of a system can
explain all aspects of the whole of such system.

 

[James Meyer]

Hi all,

Anyone know any rip-roaringly amusing mathematical jokes? I mean, of
the non-binary kind, since although they were side-splittingly funny,
we did cover those a few months back.

p.

Two plus two equals five for large values of two and small values of
five.

Jim

"I expect history to take no note of me whatsoever."
-Jim Meyer

 

[Fred Bloggs]

I read in sci.electronics.design that Paul Burridge



Yes, but being mathematical, it can't be written in ASCII.

Take this 'pseudo-code' and write in mathematical symbols:

Limit, as alpha tends to infinity, of 3 = 8.

Please view in a fixed-width font such as
Courier.


lim 3 = 8
a->oo

 

[Fred Bloggs]

Dean, to the physics department. "Why do I always have to give you
guys so much money, for laboratories and expensive equipment and
stuff. Why couldn't you be like the math. department - all they need
is money for pencils, paper and waste-paper baskets. Or even better,
like the philosophy department. All they need are pencils and paper."

Best regards,
Spehro Pefhany

I don't understand that one- what exactly is it saying that's so funny?

 

[Ben Pope]

I don't understand that one- what exactly is it saying that's so
funny?

Philosophists don't throw away the rubbish they write.

Ben

 

[Fred Bloggs]

Philosophists don't throw away the rubbish they write.

Ben

Ahhh- that is funny. Thnx

 

[Paul Burridge]

There are only 10 types of people in this world. Those that understand
binary, and those that don't.

Erm, Kev, this is a binary joke.

 

[Paul Burridge]

Please view in a fixed-width font such as
Courier.


lim 3 = 8
a->oo

Oh, blimey. This is a calculus joke, isn't it? Even in FP font I still
don't geddit. Would an explanation assist?

 

[Fred Bloggs]

Oh, blimey. This is a calculus joke, isn't it? Even in FP font I still
don't geddit. Would an explanation assist?

I was just translating- the equation makes no sense of course. But if
it's true then 1+1=0 is also true.

 

[Jim Weir]

And, of course, the old chestnut about computergeeks not knowing the difference
between Hallowe'en and Christmas because

OCT 31 = DEC 25


Jim


Paul Burridge <[email protected]>
shared these priceless pearls of wisdom:

->Hi all,
->
->Anyone know any rip-roaringly amusing mathematical jokes? I mean, of
->the non-binary kind, since although they were side-splittingly funny,
->we did cover those a few months back.
->
->p.

 

[Paul Burridge]

I was just translating- the equation makes no sense of course. But if
it's true then 1+1=0 is also true.

Er, yeah...
I can't see even Jackie Mason making that one sound funny. Oh well...
Any others?

 

[Fred Bloggs]

I read in sci.electronics.design that Paul Burridge



Yes, but being mathematical, it can't be written in ASCII.

Take this 'pseudo-code' and write in mathematical symbols:

Limit, as alpha tends to infinity, of 3 = 8.

Looks like you can get close to anything but I don't like the partial
derivative approximation and no Greek in Courier- the vector stuff looks
okay- formulas may not be accurate:

Please view in a fixed-width font such as Courier.


diffusion

\ \ \ \
[ o / o t]U(t,x)= -k [ o / o x] U(t,x)




distr of curl
___ ___ ___
\ / x A X B = (\ /.B ) A- (\ /.A) B

 

[John Woodgate]

I read in sci.electronics.design that Fred Bloggs <[email protected]>

Please view in a fixed-width font such as
Courier.


lim 3 = 8
a->oo

No, it has to be alpha, not a. Lower case omega works as well, maybe
better. You can't see the point with a or w. and you really need a
proper infinity sign as well.

Try *writing* it, using omega. You really can't render it in ASCII.

 

[John Woodgate]

I read in sci.electronics.design that Paul Burridge

Oh, blimey. This is a calculus joke, isn't it? Even in FP font I still
don't geddit. Would an explanation assist?

No, it's a visual joke. You really can't render it in ASCII well enough
to see the point.

 

[John Woodgate]

I read in sci.electronics.design that Fred Bloggs <[email protected]>

Looks like you can get close to anything but I don't like the partial
derivative approximation and no Greek in Courier

On a Windows machine with numerical keypad (NUM LOCK on), ALT0181 is μ.
ALT0223 is ß. ALT0240 is ð, which is pretty good for the partial
derivative sign.

There are quite a few of these ALT codes that don't represent
characters. It would be very helpful if they were used for the commoner
Greek letters.